Why I blog...

I use this blog as a kind of therapy. Sometimes I'm happy and want to share it, sometimes it's just a random thought and sometimes it's to deal with things in my past. After all a burden shared is a burden halved

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Just keep swimming

An ode to Dory from Nemo....

I dived in all excited and a little nervous, new adventure all that.
The water was so cold, I felt it sting a little against my skin, no worries my body will adjust to the cold soon enough.
I swam, and swam and swam....

My body grew weary, am I near the end yet?  I can't see anything, just dark cold water, all around me.
I swam on and on an on.... like there was no tomorrow.

My mind began to grow weary, just as my body had a long time ago. The relentless tides, wave upon wave crashing down upon me. I held my head as long as I could till eventually the waves became bigger than me.

It was so cold, cold, wet and relentless.

My chest hurt as I struggled to breathe. Water kept flowing into my face, I swallowed some, it was salty and the burn on my chest became almost unbearable.

I looked up there in the distance, I can see it! the horizon. It looked beautiful, with the promise of warmth and hope.

I pushed on, tired weary and almost broken.

My eyes felt heavy I wanted to close them forever and not have to worry about moving my arms about to keep me afloat. If I could just stop and rest, yes just for a little while.

I felt myself sinking, deeper and deeper, the darkness overtaking me, the sweet sweet feeling of rest.

I floated towards the bottom, when suddenly I realised I was drowning.

I panicked, kicked my feet as hard as I could, flapped my arms around me and ascended towards the top again. Must..... not...give...up

I reached the surface, took a long deep gasp and carried on....

Just keep swimming I told myself, until one day....the tide has consumed me.


  1. Shame, sweetiepie- reminds me of this:

    Stevie Smith - Not Waving But Drowning

    Nobody heard him, the dead man,
    But still he lay moaning:
    I was much further out than you thought
    And not waving but drowning.

    Poor chap, he always loved larking
    And now he's dead
    It must have been too cold for him his heart gave way,
    They said.

    Oh, no no no, it was too cold always
    (Still the dead one lay moaning)
    I was much too far out all my life
    And not waving but drowning.

  2. I like this, it just shows that no matter how hard things get you should never give up :)