Why I blog...

I use this blog as a kind of therapy. Sometimes I'm happy and want to share it, sometimes it's just a random thought and sometimes it's to deal with things in my past. After all a burden shared is a burden halved

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Just keep swimming

An ode to Dory from Nemo....

I dived in all excited and a little nervous, new adventure all that.
The water was so cold, I felt it sting a little against my skin, no worries my body will adjust to the cold soon enough.
I swam, and swam and swam....

My body grew weary, am I near the end yet?  I can't see anything, just dark cold water, all around me.
I swam on and on an on.... like there was no tomorrow.

My mind began to grow weary, just as my body had a long time ago. The relentless tides, wave upon wave crashing down upon me. I held my head as long as I could till eventually the waves became bigger than me.

It was so cold, cold, wet and relentless.

My chest hurt as I struggled to breathe. Water kept flowing into my face, I swallowed some, it was salty and the burn on my chest became almost unbearable.

I looked up there in the distance, I can see it! the horizon. It looked beautiful, with the promise of warmth and hope.

I pushed on, tired weary and almost broken.

My eyes felt heavy I wanted to close them forever and not have to worry about moving my arms about to keep me afloat. If I could just stop and rest, yes just for a little while.

I felt myself sinking, deeper and deeper, the darkness overtaking me, the sweet sweet feeling of rest.

I floated towards the bottom, when suddenly I realised I was drowning.

I panicked, kicked my feet as hard as I could, flapped my arms around me and ascended towards the top again. Must..... not...give...up

I reached the surface, took a long deep gasp and carried on....

Just keep swimming I told myself, until one day....the tide has consumed me.