Last Friday a conversation on twitter about bucket lists and growing old, turned into a long discussion with a sense of camaraderie between these women; @Shazphoto, @MamaZombie, @SamanthaPerry, @Nocturnalwenchy, @Jenty and myself. At the end of it all, we decided that we all needed a holiday and more cupcakes.
This got me thinking about my upcoming birthday. I blogged a while ago about my "wobbly" I had when I turned 30, and now in just over a month I will be turning 40!!!!
I mean, how did I get old so fast? When my children were younger 30 was old to them and 40 was positively ancient. I remember when my ex turned 40 they called him an Australopithecus (yes I had to Google the spelling).
I don't want to be old just yet, not when I still feel like I haven't really lived yet. spending most of my teens being married with children and all the responsibilities that came with that, kind of robbed me of my carefree years. (don't get me wrong I love my children and wouldn't change a thing) Spending my twenties being a responsible parent of three primary school children was great. I kept thinking, when they are big enough to leave home, I can finally have a life, go out, meet friends etc and still be young enough to enjoy it. Then came my thirties and suddenly I had a teenager! No one can prepare you for parenting a teenager, let alone three. I prefer to call this period of my life 'the dark ages' and leave it at that. (a whole other blog for another time).
Then my children suddenly grew up and became responsible adults in their own right. This was wonderful, I felt like I could finally be a little carefree and do things I like doing. At the same time I realised that I spent most of my life being a mom, a teacher, as Sunday school teacher, a domestic in my home and various other things we do instead of having fun. In between all of that I forgot to be a wife and a person. I was married for 22years and spent most of it working full day, doing household chores and sleeping. That pretty much summed up my life for two decades. And then I got divorced.
So here I am on the verge of turning 40, starting all over again. I live with my boyfriend (who is wonderful by the way). I have the financial security of a 20 year old, the body of a 60 year old, the mind and spirit of a 27 year old and the energy levels of (depending on the mood) either an 80year old or a 5 year old.
BUT.... you know what, in the end, it ain't nothing but a number!
This blog post was inspired by the cupcake crowd.